Coming of Age and Airplanes

Tonight was Y's baby sister's bat mitzvah. This kid was 5 when I first met her - just a year older than Elan is now - so I really feel like I've watched her grow up. Y is a wreck over the whole her-growing-up thing, but at least he can concede that she's turning into quite a wonderful young - if not so incredibly young - person.

The party was beautifully done and the lady of the hour both looked and spoke beautifully. C, we're so impressed with you.

My boys looked pretty spiffy in their black vests and bowties, and took the party by storm. Nobody could pull Ariel away from the dance floor, where he spent hours boogying the night away while locking eyes with every pre-pubescent girl in sight, and trust me, there were many. He put on a special performance for each of his favorites and only paused to ask random guests if they'd thought to bring any chicken nuggets, because he sure AS HELL could go for some about then.

Elan giggled at his brother but wouldn't dance and wouldn't talk to anyone remotely female until he had to go to the bathroom, and the female in question was yours truly. There is always, always a line in the lady's room, and tonight was no exception, but Elan and I stayed cluttered in a stall for a good twenty minutes while he took care of business and gave me a detailed report of his progress. Fortunately, he also tends to get rather philisophical while on the toilet, and we've had some of our best conversations while he's in this rather compromised position.

"The bat mitzvah is really fun," he started. "Chani looks so big. And she talked in front of everyone. And everyone is watching her. It's really fun. The bat mitzvah is really fun. When's she gonna have another one?"

"You only have one in your life," I explained. "When girls turn twelve, and Jewish boys have their bar mitzvah when they turn thirteen."

"So she's never going to have another one, EVER?"

"Nope. But you'll have one some day."

"Oh. I don't ever want a bat mitzvah."

"You never know. You might not be so shy at that age."

"Ugh," he groans.

"What?"

"Strawberries."

Ah. Back to the job at hand.

I thought about how different Elan and Ariel were - how Ariel thrived as the center of attention, how he'd smiled and posed for each and every picture as if it was all just part of his career - the burden of the paparazzi, and how Elan had - well, needed to be bribed. How Elan couldn't imagine being the focus of a room full of people for one evening and not wanting to JUST DIE.

On the drive home, Y and I figured the boys would be out like lights upon contact with their car seats - they'd worked so hard all evening - but even Enya couldn't get them to doze off. Ariel chattered sleepily in an obvious effort to remain conscious, and got excited when he spotted an airplane high above the highway.

"Daddy? You sometime take me on a airplane, just me and you?" he asked.

"Sure, sweetie," Y replied. "We'll go on a special airplane sometime together."

"To Chago? Jus' me and you?"

"Of course," Y promised, and Elan and I smiled at each other over his little brother's silliness.

It must have made an impression, however, because when I tucked Elan into bed minutes later, he twirled a cowlick of hair in the exact same manner he had every night since he was six months old, and said, "Mommy? Can we talk?"

"Ok," I said. "For a few minutes, but you've got to get some sleep. What's up?"

He twirled more furiously, trying to think of something we could discuss that would prevent me from leaving the room for a few moments longer, and finally came up with: "Sometime can I go on a trip with Daddy on an airplane, just me and him, and you stay home? Would that be okay with you? If we left you?"

"I think so," I replied. "You could have a special trip with Daddy. But maybe not for too long. Maybe for just a little while, so that when I started to really miss you, you'd already be coming back."

"Well I would leave you with one of my projects so you'd be able to remember me," he offered.

"Know what?" I touched the tip of his nose gently. "I don't need a project to remind me of you. I don't need anything like that. You're my child, and I couldn't ever forget you for even a second."

Elan looked at me thoughtfully, then pulled me close in hug. "Actually, I don't think I want to go," he said.

Swoon. Turns out Ariel's not the only flirt in town.

More pictures from the night are here.